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One thing that life assures is the on-off nature of most things, what is regular and standard now can turn and flee the next moment… The constant change, welcome or otherwise.
One of the things I have had as a constant is family. Like every day I wake up and they’re there, all up in my space, taking over stuff, but they’re mine… But now, seeing as I belong to a superficially gregarious family (meaning we just get together for show, otherwise it’s just hi and bye, not even ‘a plane crashed into your hood, hope your ok’), we’re getting together to celebrate our familiarity. And to catch up on things. And to smile and laugh with new additions (there’s two, a cousin and a nephew). And to catch up with long-lost relatives. And to remark at how tall/large/thin/lost/found/arbitrary adjective/educated you have become…
Now I’m all for family and relations and such, but I want to branch off and go on my own. That’s one of the consequences of having a small family, greater individual independence, once one has established that when they go off on their own, they will not starve, they’re good.
While my mother had several siblings to feed and clothe and educate after her mother passed, I have one brother, that’s it. I’ve become an individual, and as such I have formed my own private thoughts, feelings, understandings, opinions, attitudes, language and such. Which means I can survive for a while outside the family.
But she, on the other hand, is social, by choice as well as circumstance. Like she has to consider them when she’s deciding things, meaning she gets frustrated a lot, they’re not exactly a walk in the park to deal with, then there’s the fact that they, as well as her, have lives to live…
The things people do for family.
Does being my own person mean I have to cut off anyone that could stop me from being such? I don’t think so. While no man is an island, I would consider myself a tombolo (thank you, high school geography), an island connected to the mainland by an ever-so-slight sliver of rock and earth. I’m still connected, but come a storm strong enough and I break free…